Build Your Best Birth Team
There are three key members to your birth team. A birth team does not necessarily need to be limited to three members, but having these specific individuals on your team are paramount to receiving the support you need to achieve your birth goals. Let’s breakdown the importance of each one:
Birth Team Member #1 - Your Care Provider
Your your care provider plays a crucial role in working toward having the birth you want. Why? Because when women are in labor, it’s natural for us to look to our care providers, the “experts”, for how to take on whatever labor is throwing at us - to ask what our next steps should be so that we can birth our babies swiftly and safely. (That’s what we all want, right?) So choosing that person is not a decision to make lightly.
The reality is your care provider can either support your birth goals and work with you to help you achieve them, or they won’t make working with you a priority.
There are a lot of great OBs and midwives out there, and praise the Lord for them! But sometimes finding the one that’s best for you can take some time. Talking to your friends and family about who they used is a great first step, but it’s not the only step. The next key step is to interview several care providers so that you can choose the one you feel the most comfortable with and who shows a desire to listen to what is important to you.
Keep in mind that you always have options! If you aren’t feeling supported or heard, keep looking for a provider that will make you feel those things. It’s not uncommon for women to change care providers, so don’t feel alone if you’ve considered switching.
At the end of the day, you want to look to your care provider while in labor and feel confident and comfortable with their direction.
(I’ll share in future posts some of the questions to ask providers you interview, how to determine what your birth goals even are, and other key players in your birth team later. Stay tuned!)
Birth Team Member #2 - Your Partner
Another key player on your birth team is your partner - there is no other person who can love-on and support a laboring woman like her partner can. Hands down.
Some partners are excited about the opportunity to participate in a birth, but most often, partners find themselves hesitant or overwhelmed by determining what their role should be during labor. It’s understandable! It’s not a role that is talked about enough, so caring for a laboring woman is often a foreign concept for men. And while that’s an understandable reason for them to be reluctant, the goal is to move partners from feeling tentative and nervous about supporting their loved ones through labor to being confident and equipped.
So how do you do that? There are several things you can do together but I will focus on just a few key steps over the next couple of days. Here’s your first tip:
Put your partner in charge of your laboring environment and discuss your preferences/needs in regard to it in advance - This is an easy yet important way for your partner to be involved! Even if they aren’t sure what to do next in reference to your comfort, they can always be mindful of keeping the lights dim, ensuring it’s quiet, keeping the temperature cool, monitoring who comes in you room (and sometimes more importantly - who doesn’t come in your room), etc. Your ability to feel safe and comfortable in your environment does wonders for your body’s ability to progress, and who better to make you feel safe than your man!
Take a childbirth class together - This is the BEST way you can help your partner prepare to support you through labor. Partners need to learn and prepare, just like you do! Partners need to think like that famous line from Jerry Maguire - “Help me help you.” The Comprehensive Childbirth Class, starting in May, is the perfect class for practically helping you and your partner how to work together through labor and birth. Your partner will learn about:
How to recognize the different stages of labor
Massage and pressure techniques to help increase your increase your comfort
Helpful (and potentially harmful!) phrases to use during labor
How (and why) to identify muscles tension in your body that needs to be addressed, etc.
And more!
You can register for the Comprehensive Childbirth Class by clicking here!
Birth Team Member #3 - Your Doula
The last member of your birth team is your doula! Having a doula is yet another great way to prepare you AND your partner for labor. One of the roles of a doula is to enhance your partner’s abilities; it is not to replace your partner. What does this look like practically?
Doulas can show your partner how to perform comfort measures, remind them to have you change positions at certain points, prompt them to bring you more water, etc. In this way, having a doula can help your partner be more hands on.
Doulas also understand that no one can love on you during labor like your partner can. With that in mind, doulas can perform comfort measures and give labor support to free up your partner - allowing him to look you in your eyes, stroke your hair, and provide sweet encouragement that is most impactful when delivered by your loved one.
And did you know that studies show that women who have the support of a doula during labor report more positive birth experiences, have shorter labors, are less likely to have a cesarean - just to name a few of the benefits? It’s true!
As a doula, my goal is to help women have the birth they want to have. Your birth is your story, and I desire to help you write it in such a way that you approach your birth with expectant joy and take on labor with peaceful strength. You can learn more about my birth and doula philosophies on my website, www.ldbirthservices.com. You can also schedule a free consultation with me by emailing me or requesting a consultation through my website.